VENT

i don't know if you're happy but honestly i do wish you are
i know we went through a lot together for the past year but i'm trying now to let it go. it was hard and it still is but either way i promised you something.
from the beginning of our friendship, we were good friends then became best friends and then lovers. i always you promised you that i'll be there for you no matter what the circumstance is. i know it's hard for us right now but i want you to know yes you did hurt me and it still does hurt, but i want you to know even though it hurts, i want to say that you know what? i'm still here for you.

i know this may be random and all but i just needed to let it out. it hurts to know as a "friend" that i have no idea what you're doing now, i just hope it's for the best. it's been such an emotional stage with us and right now we're acting like it was nothing . i always told you that i want you to be happy and it may suck that right now i may not be in your life. just know i'm here. when you need someone, i'm here for you, i may be the last person you may run to but i never wanted it to be like this. we tried to make it good but it's just not the same anymore. we're both different people now living life.

i don't need to repeat and say what you've done but know that it hurt me... a lot.
it sucks having to know how you are from people and not from you. but i guess it's just how it is. remember our promise that i'll be here for you, i'm one call away, i'm one message away & one bus away. hope you're doing good cac.




- on another note:

reaching calgary tomorrow night & yes i am excited but at the same time thanking the one who's been through with it with me this month. it was really emotional this feb-march but you stepped up and took care of me. you're the first person who's ever guided me through the perspective that i was blind with. you helped me through so much and it means so a lot. through the tears and calls you stayed by my side, through the whole me being emotional about dream having to be here by now. you were there for me, through it all. even when i was sick and not knowing that you knew, you flew down just to see me, just to take care of me & to make sure i was well and ready to go back to work. waking up in a hospital bed was hard enough but someone like you being there for me was amazing. thank you for wiping my tears when all i did was cry all night, thank you for lending a shoulder when i needed to rest my head on, thank you for being such a great listener. thank you for being a good boyfriend. enough said.