Monday, October 19, 2009

Put My Head Up

My First day off from Jacob BUT yet I'm still working with meetings and shoots. Got home two hours ago from a meeting and then getting ready for a photoshoot. Halloween theme baby! Working everyday of this week and working at the other job to earn more money! (yay). Can't wait to leave Toronto with the crew to get my mind off things and just let go of the stress that i've been going through, finally!

Family, you have been awesome. Strongest ever, even though i'm a pain in the ass, you guys still keep up with me and watch over me. you guys are the best && i love you.

Selected Few, we've been through adventures. From being in the police station, to the hospital. We kept it strong as a family. You guys have shown true love and true friendship. Thanks for always listening to my problems, offering advices, etc. Love you guys til death.

Person # 1: even though we were together for quite a little of time, you have shown me how to be sweet, you showed me how much you really did care about me. we've known each other as the ones who can't get with each other, but we showed them that we could do it. i wasn't too sure of being with you was the best but now that it's harder for me, i actually really miss you. you still send me your letters with the songs that mean so much. thank you for everything, from your time and from everything. <3

Person # 2: we've been through the craziest year ever, i have to say, we had the most crucial drama ever but in the end we pulled through. thank you for everything you've done for me. seriously, no guy has shown me that much love ever. we made our mistakes but we both let go of it and moved on. i'm determined to know that i can be with you, to take care of me and to love me. you have been great to me, by being patient with me. you allow me to feel good about myself no matter what. you never liked my gigs, shoots & guys around me. BUT you understand that, this is my life and that you trust me no matter what. it means a lot to me and it takes a man to truly have patience for a person like me to deal with. i know i'm not the easiest girl to deal with, but yet you still show me that you're not going anywhere. i love you babe <3

Person # 3: i'm quite disappointed in you for disappearing in my life. whatever happened to "no matter what i got you"? i guess your words were never the truth. you say so much for me to actually believe you and put my hopes up but then in the end i'm always the one who gets hurt. i'm done for the pain, i went through it since last year. it's pretty sad cause the one who i actually really loved is the one missing from my life. it's stupid of me thinking that if we ever could be once again i would drop whoever i was with just to be with you. you take the advantage knowing that you know i'd come to you instantly. but honestly, i'm so done with that. i can't just put my hopes up for nothing. now that november 11 is coming, this is just something i need to look up to and try to let go. and friends going through the pain that i went through with you but with their so called boyfriends does not help at all from keeping this stress away. i just hope you realize that you're hurting a lot of people and vanishing away is not helping at all. step it up.

-HRS

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